Black Market Codpieces and Coats for Snowmen

(The uncut version of an entry I wrote on MangaBullet today.)

( More at the jump )

Mae public, but don't pick up, meta_roundup. xposted to Dreamwidth.

(Please do not pick up, meta_roundup)

The insistence on separation, the insistence that there be absolutely no male characters near the couple.

I mean, I understand the logic. Kind of like how I understand why people stay in Pentecostalism even if they know that it's evil, if not profoundly wrong, but I don't get it. I understand why people are into Twilight, but I don't get it. I understand why people read the Gor series and love it, but I don't get it.

I don't get this insistence on separation thing. I understand it, but I don't get it.

I mean, I understand wholly, because F/F relationships are taken the least seriously in the Real World, and such things are a male fantasy, and I kind of get that in Japan, it's supposedly a phase and then a girl gets older and marries a nice, rich man. I understand why yuri fans tend to be distrusting at best when it comes to male characters. I also understand when it's the inverse for yaoi fans--in both cases, the homosexuality is something that needs "cured" by a Magical Penis/Magical Vagina and then *poof!* Gay be gone. I understand why people wouldn't like this. Fuck, I totally get why people hate it. I hate that trope and want it to die in a fire. I get that reason. I totally understand that there are other reasons, too--the guy character could be a wholesale store full of Fail, or they stuck him in there to prove that the two girls aren't fucking, or the guy is a douchebag, or the guy is actively trying to break the couple up--but other than that, I don't get the dislike of guys near the yuri if they're not actively interfering.

What, is it like if the girls are near the Forbidden Fruit (Forbidden banana, perhaps?), then the Yuri is destroyed for all time and eternity? Will that girl have to go to fucking guys just because a guy is in the vicinity and happens to show mild to moderate interest, but isn't actively being a homewrecking fuck? No, not really. unless said main character was bisexual, and of course, those don't exist. [/rant]

Bottom line, I ask this again, Yuri Fandom, What the fuck? I mean, I understand wholly, but, sorry. Lost me there. I'm all for guys as supporting characters and whatnot. Even the totally dicky ones. On The Other Hand, if said guy is the de-gaying agent and there's no other reason for him to be there? Get him the fuck outta the story. Have him run over by a bus or something, just get him the fuck out.

(please do not pick up, meta_roundup)

It's Insane Theory Time with Jordi! With a side of Fanfic Writing Meta.

The reason why lots of yuri anime and manga take place in all-girls schools as opposed to co-ed schools:

The environment is not conducive in a co-ed school, maybe? I guess so. I guess the fear (at least in fans) is one of the two protagonists, if not both of them, will split up by the end of the story to be with guys, by the end of the story. The two girls' love cannot stand the test of time when there are Teh Boys there with their penises. Or something. Frankly, even I catch myself thinking that way whenever I read yuri that takes place in a co-ed school, because it happens in every fanfic ever. It's a pet peeve of mine when I see it in yaoi or in yuri fanfiction: In which one character saves another from The Gay. It makes me want to punch myself in the throat for reading it, and then it makes me want to punch the author in the throat for writing it. Because no, the Magical Cock will not straighten that girl you've had your eyes on if she prefers Mounds to your Almond Joy, thank you and goodnight.

this is part of why I goddamn loathe reading Sora/Kairi. SO GODDAMN MUCH

But I was thinking...wouldn't it be a greater testament of the couple's love if they stayed together in a co-ed school, despite the flood of mixed messages of "it's just a phase" and well-meaning-yet-utterly-clueless guys (and even a not-so-well-meaning slapdick guy or two who go on to live happy lives with their left hands)? Wouldn't it be as meaningful as such a romantic relationship formed in an all-girls school would be? I mean, yeah, opportunities for girl-on-girl romance wouldn't be as plentiful in a co-ed school, but come on, girls are probably more likely to hook up there than in an all-girls school, actually.

What I'm trying to get at is...

WHAT IN THE GOD DAMN HELL IS YOUR MAJOR MALFUNCTION, YURI FANDOM!? That is a question I do not ask very often, too, but what the fuck?

If your OTP is able to withstand the end of the world, or a divorce in the family, or homophobic assholes, but can easily be broken apart by a random guy, then your OTP is not that strong. I say this of yaoi pairings, too. If a girl is all it takes to break up an OTP, then that OTP is fucking weak.

This has been Jordi saying have a nice day.

SUFFER! SUFFER AS I HAVE! DAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

( You are about to read content that is unsuitable for minors. Or adults. Or anyone. )

I don't get Code Geass. Does that make me an idiot? I mean...besides my not-at-all-latent hypnokink and my love of Ali Project knowing no bounds to the point of me actually considering watching Kurogane no Linebarrels (which isn't supposed to be any good whatsoever), should I bother with it?

I got to three chapters of Twilight and stopped. The only thing I quit that early into was Kanon.

I got to FIFTY-NINE chapters of that weird BDSM Naruto AU fic before I quit.

Fuck, I even finished a few of Shirohane's oneshots.

So I have come to a few conclusions:

One, I have a higher tolerance for bad fiction on the Internet than I do for bad fiction that is published.

Two, the weird BDSM Naruto AU is not terrible, and has a lot of good things about it, obscured by the WTF stuff. More detail in another entry.

Three, Twilight beats Left Behind by a million miles. Thank you, Left Behind series. I can no longer hate books in differing amounts.

And four, even if the books suck, Stephanie Meyer is kinda cute. It's bad when that's the only redeeming factor.

(meta_roundup, please do not pick this up!)


If there are a fuckton of SakuraxRandom Akatsuki Member fics around, and there are also a surprising number of KairixRandom Organization Member fics around, does this mean that I was totally right in comparing Kairi's fandom situation to that of Sakura's?

Aside from the fact that I find both of them awesome, the respective fandoms hate them and want them to die, and they've both been paired up with the Village Idiot and the Resident Emo Kid (except Riku isn't emo...unlike Sasuke's, whose Emo Level is OVER NINE THOUSAAAAAAND)?

wat.


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Also, expect more Demyx/Kairi from me. I'm all interested now.